I never thought that years later, after i failed statistics that I would face another tragedy- losing my job. I realized the consequences and now I’m starting to lose hope. What if i really don’t deserve a second chance? What if I’m bound to fail and never stand up again? What will happen to me?
And as if that’s not enough, my parents doesn’t know about all of this. That I’m already unemployed and doing interviews. It hurts me to the core, that everyday i have to hide and fake a smile. This is so far the most heartbreaking experience for me. There are times that i would break down and realize that i deserve this. I deserve all the shit that’s been happening to me. I wonder how can i get up every morning just to live a life of lie. And the sad thing is, i don’t know how long I’ll be like this.
The only hope i have is my application in Las Pinas. I know that if I won’t be accepted, it would be over. Maybe because they have found out what really happened to me in my previous company. Or maybe they found someone better than me. I really don’t know.
The only thing that i have right now is a prayer. Like before, I’m waiting again for a miracle- a reason for me to continue and to redeem myself.