Lost and Found

I was once lost,

nearly for 2 long months.

My suffering seems to last forever,

far away from my happy ever after.

 

I’m on the way of redeeming myself,

from all those great mistakes.

I promised myself that I will turn a new leaf,

and face life without fear.

 

My prayer has been granted,

and I’m now back on track.

I may not change what happened in the past,

but I could start all over again.

 

The lost sheep has been found,

her shepherd is now proud.

The past was just a minor setback,

and now’s the time for her major comeback.

 

 

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On being alone

For the past 2 years, ever since I graduated from college, i haven’t found a true friend yet in the workplace. I thought that when you start chatting with someone, laughed on silly things and even go out for lunch, that someone becomes your friend, but no. Yes, i chat with them, I even laugh with them sometimes and share some tiny bits of my life but it feels empty. I’ve felt alone in a crowd before and I used to cry about it but now, I know its weird but i feel happy. Maybe because I’ve been used to it, but more than that, I feel comfortable when I’m alone. I mean no drama, no harsh judgement from others and just being myself. I thought that I won’t be strong enough to be alone but now, I’m so proud of myself that I can do things just by myself without being uncomfortable.

It does not mean that I’m antisocial or whatsoever, it’s just that I’m in a wrong place full of people I can’t relate to. Instead of trying to fit in, I decided to just be myself and i never regretted it. Yes, it can be lonely but i easily forget it when I think about my family waiting for me at home, or my friends who are missing me. I think this is a part of maturity, that I can stand alone and do what I wanted to do, not for anyone but for myself. I know that I won’t stay there forever and maybe this is just a phase of life that I need to pass- to be independent. It’s challenging yet I’ve learned many new things about myself, and i think that’s what matters to me right now.

– It’s easy to stand with the crowd, but it takes courage to stand alone. 

 

Social life facts 101

Hello again folks ! Here’s  a blog post about my social life and how i deal with humans in this crazy, unpredictable society.

  1. I don’t make the move first- That’s how my getting-to-know- each- other goes about- I won’t talk unless you talk to me first. Usually, its either I’m shy or I’m not interested in a person. But when I talk to you first, which i rarely do, it is a good sign- its means that I like you (a little bit). LOL. 
  2. I’m not a people person – As if the above fact is not yet a dead giveaway, yes I’m anti-social. No, just kidding 😀 but I really prefer to be alone most of the time, especially when I’m in a crowd that I don’t like (ex: my officemates). 
  3. If I’m crazy, wild and outrageous for you, it means that I’m comfortable with you– and if the opposite, it doesn’t mean that i hate you- well, except if you’re my enemy, but it means that I just don’t wanna talk to you, or simply don’t care at all. Period.
  4. I lie about my feelings  when it comes to strangers or people I’m not close to – I always do this every time I’m forced to talk to someone, I mean UGH it is really annoying.
  5. I show my childish, cute annoying side to my  family and friends– This is really true- lol my friends always complains that I’m a pain, well in a good way because I tease them a lot and I even do some baby-talking. LMAO. Just seeing my friends reaction whenever i do it. Priceless 🙂

At first, I felt bad because of this cold personality of mine, but i realized that It’s one of my of greatest defense in life- I never experienced being betrayed by a friend, because I’m really, really choosy when it comes to friendship. I do believe in the saying that ” if a you really matter to a person, he/she will do the effort to stay close to you.” No explanations.

But hey, it doesn’t mean that I’m bitter or I hate the human race lol, you can talk to me if you want to : ) if I felt some sincerity in a person, I’ll have a conversation with him/her right away, but don’t expect me to start the conversation, as I mentioned earlier.

So that’s all and here’s to socially-awkward people out there! lemme give you a high five !